The House of Glocal resolution on Brexit
(2016/1(HKA))
The House of Glocal (actually, just one rather less eloquent author),
– having regard to the notorious unreliability of British opinion polling,
– having regard to the statement of David Beckham, that the UK should remain in the EU,
– having regard to James Bond’s t-shirt, which states that “no man is an island”,
– having regard to Donald Trump being wrong on pretty much everything anyway,
– having regard to the significant proportion of British voters who believe that the results of the Brexit referendum will be rigged,
– having regard to David Cameron, who created eurosceptic sentiment but then suddenly became a passionate EU supporter after it became slightly harder for immigrants to claim benefits,
A. whereas the majority of Brits have an IQ score that is higher than that of Germany;
B. whereas Batman could have done just as well without Michael Caine;
C. whereas the British Isles were once connected to the European mainland allowing people to move unhindered between the regions;
D. whereas the three-pin British plug socket can easily be tweaked to allow for the insertion of superior continental plugs;
E. whereas clockwise roundabouts are statistically slightly safer than counter-clockwise roundabouts;
F. whereas there is a good chance that those voters stupid enough to support “leave” will in fact tick the wrong box by mistake,
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1. Predicts that the UK will in fact remain an EU member and that the remain campaign will win 60-40;
2. Demands the geographical relocation of Great Britain to a place in the North Sea somewhere near Iceland, should they decide on Brexit anyway;
3. Especially Cornwall;
4. Concedes that Scotland and Wales may stay near the continent;
5. Calls on all Brits to vote “remain”.
