Woman walking against yellow background
Are you seeking connection? Image by Rodion Kutsaev, public domain.

Ask Prudence: Connection and Boundaries

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Dear Prudence,

I am a Master’s student at Uni Leipzig and I have been here since the start of the first semester in October. However, I am struggling to meet people outside of my class. Especially with restrictions limiting our access to other people anyway! I am looking both for friends and potential partners.

Where does one go these days in Leipzig to meet nice, like-minded people?

Hopefully yours,
Seeking Connection

 


 

Dear Seeking Connection,

I can well understand how you feel.  In these times of lockdowns, we are all feeling a little disconnected.

In the interests of staying safe while making connections, you might try to find some online groups that are enthusiastic about the same things you are.  Do you have any hobbies that might be shared by others? Try and find a like-minded group online – Facebook has many groups you could join, e.g. Leipzig Expats | International Community.

Of course, you could try to go out and meet people in person, but I would avoid bars and nightclubs, unless it’s a student bar like Studentenkeller (StuK), for example. You might have more luck joining a theatre group or volunteering at a shelter or something similar.

As an English speaker, you might enjoy English quiz nights or English Bingo, for details keep an eye on Leipglo’s events.

I wish you good luck and happy hunting!

Best,
Pru


 

Black pug in raincoat
Image by Charles Deluvio, public domain.

Dear Prudence,

I recently adopted an older dog and everything was fine for the first few days. On the 4th day, my brother came to visit and he didn’t behave well. He was yelling and being loud and unpredictable and the dog really didn’t like it. Ever since then, my dog seems to be afraid of me – he actually growled at me the other day!

How do I let my brother know that his behavior was unwelcome?

I don’t even want him to come around anymore, but my mom is upset that I would prioritize a dog over family. Help! What should I do?

All the best,
Trixie

 


 

Dear Trixie,

First and foremost, well done for adopting a senior dog! Not many people do. And on a different topic – how inconsiderate is your brother? Of course, family dynamics being what they are, it might be tricky for you to navigate these waters. But don’t be afraid to set boundaries, either for your brother or your mum.

If any person (including a family member) comes into your house, they are obliged to abide by your rules.

Anyone who can’t do that, regardless of your relationship, has no right to come into your home and disturb things. Especially when dealing with a sentient but mute creature like a pet. You are perfectly within your rights to calmly but firmly insist that your brother limit his enthusiasm and control his voice when he visits you. Not even for the dog’s sake – how about your own nerves?

Setting boundaries can be scary, especially with family, but you will feel better for it and your brother might learn a thing or two, as well!

Good luck and give your dog a cuddle from me!

Best,
Pru

 


 

Do you have a question for Prudence? Feel free to email askprudence@leipglo.com, and she will answer your questions about life and love in Leipzig and beyond. While we can’t guarantee that we can publish every submission, we will do our best to include everyone. Anonymity guaranteed!

Leipglo's oracle of wisdom and wit, Prudence le Pomp, answers your burning questions about life and love in Leipzig. Email askprudence@leipglo.com with your questions.

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